Camels
VIII.x. ( from the ashes of this ) darling town ( a phoenix in ) fall colours
ADEIMANTOS: ( o Sokrates, why have you named
him fearless? ) ( and why wont he say more? )
( even if we ask ) ( poke ) hm-mm.
( he still wont speak ) ( his irony
grows thick as wool ) baaa ( but how
is this being unafraid? ) ( doesnt he know
they-we want to hear everything about him? )
SOKRATES: for( it does )nt have-and-hold( the )nature
( growth-origin )( of )the steersman( kubernetes )
( they-dyad were steering )
( to bind himself )( to be in-need )of the sailors,
to be ruled( dyad-spider-web )by( from-under him )self.
οὐ γὰρ ἔχει φύσιν κυβερνήτην
ναυτῶν δεῖσθαι ἄρχεσθαι ὑφ᾽ αὑτοῦ
ADEIMANTOS: ( thinks for a while ) ( o kubernetes )
night falls over the town in a blink ( o sprinkles! )
( what has-and-holds your nature, origin, growth? )
( where did you come from? ) ( would you show us? )
we would take you to the spot by the lake,
( okay, lets go ) ( and walk around it ) ( one way
and the other way ) ( but walking anytime we could )
( some days the high path on the ridge, some days
the low ) ( sun, rain, or snow ) ( she found a place
to listen to herself ) ( in him ) ( we-seeking-we )
( we were right there ) ( we were reflection ) ( we
were seasons ) ( light air and water ) ( burning
star ) ( so ) ( neither are we a city man ) ( strictly )
( nor are we a business person ) ( really? )
( cant be ) ( not here ),
SOKRATES: nor(for)the wise(skilled-clever ones)
to go(up to)the double-folding-she-doors
(you will thrust out-of-doors)
of the wealthy-rich(ones),
οὐδὲ τοὺς σοφοὺς ἐπὶ τὰς τῶν πλουσίων θύρας ἰέναι,
ADEIMANTOS: ( in the rebellious phases of my youth )
we inhale the cellar-like scent in the air,
( and we reflect upon the few important years )
( sprinkles! ) ( spent waiting for the metro line )
( or behind the gynmasium of a public school )
( and lets be near the nations capital )
( coming-and-going to the man-made-real )
( the weird, the wild, the human unpredictable )
( for company and fumes to strengthen breadth )
( by breath of fog ) ( where sky looks like a cave )
( and yes, we walk the razors edge of her )
where we used to sit smoking as a teenager,
( as if self-damage would make her invincible )
( after some boy had said her joy was hideous ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( but still excuse me Sokrates,
we didnt tell you everything he said.
he also said she was an hysterical bitch ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and he called her a self-entitled brat ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and he called her profoundly selfish ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and he told her she had to change her work,
to be more like his work,
and his work ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and he said what she was doing was
the opposite of philosophy ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and he forced her to repeat out loud
that anything she would ever put on paper
would make even the most expensive paper,
the finest, most exquisite paper — worthless ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and he called her stupid
many times ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and she remembers every one
of their names, the men who said those things,
and one of them was her father ),
SOKRATES: but still he( refining-subtlety-cleverly-inventing )this lied,
ἀλλ᾽ ὁ τοῦτο κομψευσάμενος ἐψεύσατο,
ADEIMANTOS: ( but self-care would make her invisible )
( so we- ) shiver in layers too light ( -being a puffy coat ),
( we keep him warm and insulate her truth )
( but when he accidentally births her puffer fish . . . )
( then we were punished many times ) ( from many
angles ) ( and each one hurts ) ( this knucklehead )
( always sorry ) ( lol ) ( until thirty-five or so ) ( when we realize )
( the punishments are pulling him away from her )
( and thats our line ) ( thats when our voice says ) ( no )
( then ) hiding fom the world ( we try to save
what can be saved ) ( we really do ) ( before we leave
to find ourself whom we dont know ) ( and we
find love ) ( because we find another man
who does believe in her ) ( and loves her too )
( so go looking in every way you can )
( as pieces by her paradise make whole ),
SOKRATES: but the true( unconcealed )
has been brought-forth( by nature )
( they had been brought-forth )( to have brought-forth )
( it has flown, fled, flight )( to have escaped )
( the charge )( they had been in exile ),
τὸ δὲ ἀληθὲς πέφυκεν,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and dreams, as Hamlet shows, hold on to you )
( so ) the lake doesnt know summer ( we ) is ( being ) gone,
( but she refused ) ( then ) ( to let go ) ( lake-mirror-black )
( with lines and leash and bricks of living gold )
( it yanks a chain ) ( commands ) ( build me a temple )
( and somehow ) ( how? ) ( we still suspect its Theuth )
( as if the very shadow master called him home )
( how did it make us feel? ) ( afraid, of course )
( when your own heart is hounding you ) ( by force )
( we didnt rush? ) ( there was no need ) ( if true,
we couldnt slow the course of destiny )
and on the walk back to town ( we put it thus )
( what we would do in heaven ) ( with joy )
( why shouldnt we do it now? ) ( own victory )
( but music was our designated work ),
SOKRATES: whether wealthy or poor
( he would )produce by work( make, fabricate )
( he would labor and toil, strive, exert, construct )
( he would be weary, exhausted, fatigued )
( and he would suffer, perhaps be ill,
until his work was done ) ( until hed done
his work ) ( you too ) ( youd do your work )
( you would produce, make, fabricate, labor
and toil, strive, exert, construct ) ( you would
be weary, exhausted, fatigued ) ( and you
would suffer, perhaps be ill ) ( but work, until
youve done your work ),
ἐάντε πλούσιος ἐάντε πένης κάμνῃ,
ADEIMANTOS: ( where are the healers? you would ask )
( and ) we would show you ( the church or the hospital )
( at first, he wouldnt know ) ( but of course Asclepios )
( and either would take hold of you ) ( for a price )
( and ) it looks exactly the same ( from the outside )
( as it used to ) ( when we passed by here before )
( by the way, her diet was inspired by his brother-
called city of pigs ) ( from book II ) ( were fascinated
to translate that passage for ourselves . . . )
( as we make our own ) ( through these interiors )
( we-practicing care of death ),
SOKRATES: to be forced( constraint-necessity )
( o prison-chained )
to go( up to )the double-folding-she-doors
( you will thrust out-of-doors )( of )doctors-healers,
ἀναγκαῖον (489ξ) εἶναι ἐπὶ ἰατρῶν θύρας ἰέναι
ADEIMANTOS: ( and indeed ) ( if you happen to live near a mosque
and hear the prayer, that is what ear-openers
have sounded like for her ) ( she wouldnt be here
without Al-Fatiha ) ( and the Basmala
she has called the poets seed ) ( hard liquor )
( she-me is really Muslim ) ( this remains her path )
( because the word-song leads back through herself )
( we-being roots or branches of a tree ) ( of twin Mercies )
( of dyadic-Ophelia as the translation may be )
( and there are many Names by which we trans )
( she keeps Al-Lateef, from her husbands hand,
nearby her pillow, where she sleeps at night )
( whats in a name ) ( this one ) ( dreams opener )
( to be aware by what music we hear ) ( or whose )
( and anyway ) ( to take our time, we might pass by )
my favorite playground ( and play is how we learn )
( its where we watch the boys do monkeybars )
( its where we ) ( going on the swing ) ( swing high )
( swing low ) ( big sky ) ( sweet chariot ) ( blue way )
( to feel ) ( being-away ) ( from home ) ( my feelings )
( not in words yet ) but the trees do ( hum to me )
( so the tire-swing in the forest treats us best ),
SOKRATES: and( indeed for )all the( being-bound-
in-needing-of )to be ruled,
( to go )to( the double-folding-she-doors )
of he who is able( potentially )to rule
( to begin, to show, to be the first ),
καὶ πάντα τὸν ἄρχεσθαι δεόμενον ἐπὶ τὰς τοῦ ἄρχειν δυναμένου,
ADEIMANTOS: ( it was mostly safe to explore )
in my childhood neighborhood ( we-being alone )
( and following new sidewalks to the broken ones )
( we would walk along the older curving roads )
( discover paths through the adjacent woods )
( our summers growing thicker in the green )
( but ) soon enough theyll drop their fall colours
( and then well be crimson-burgundy again ) ( hotly! )
( as we wind our way along the creek ) ( we would
go wading in the silt ) ( and once, we measured
pollutants in the water for the science fair )
( discovering a biohazard ) ( won first place )
( another year we wrote computer code
to simulate three algorithmic modes
of evolution ) ( for that, the prize
was from the cia ) ( then failed
to rsvp for a tour of langley )
( we-being intelligence )
( woof! woof! )
SOKRATES: ( and )not( for )the ruler( o beginners-showing-first )
( of )the ones-being-ruled( all those coming after us )
to be bound-to and in need-of( the ones-coming-after )
( and )( to be )ruled( to begin, to show, to be the first ),
οὐ τὸν ἄρχοντα δεῖσθαι τῶν ἀρχομένων ἄρχεσθαι,
ADEIMANTOS: ( and if we dared to dream of )
the house we wanted to live in ( it would be safe
and quiet and calm and light ) ( with level floors )
( and high ceilings ) ( with room enough for thought )
( and an exceptionally cozy bed ) ( he
cant help himself ) ( he longs for fresh white linen )
( and enough blankets and pillows and throws )
( and baskets and drawers to fold and put things in )
( and hooks on certain walls for hanging clothes
or brooms or spoons or other kinds of tools )
( some other familiars artwork on the walls )
( and a woodstove for warm toes in the winter )
( despite the chill ) not even fully here yet
( assuming winter ) ( and slow-grown food
that tastes like loving care ) ( to keep us there ),
SOKRATES: if( there )would be any( furtherance,
advantage )help( o help )of him( or for him ),
( to-by-for )the( she- )truth( unconcealed ),
οὗ ἂν τῇ ἀληθείᾳ τι ὄφελος ᾖ.
ADEIMANTOS: ( but thats the house we wanted )
and the one next to it where no one does ( the chores )
( where no one wants to go up to the doors )
( but its ours too ) ( has been our house before )
( until Nobody does ) ( go up to the doors )
( and Nobody starts making us do chores )
( related to fake sailors ) ( and heres the truth )
( we cant predict what we will say or do )
( or what the response will be ) and the lake
will know ( this one is deadly dangerous )
( but look, Socrates, at what happened to you )
SOKRATES: but still, he wouldnt miss-the-mark
(and you wouldnt-wont miss),
(by likening-representing-comparing)
the now-ruling(rulers)(beginning-first)politicians
(political men),
to(for-by)the sailors(we)were just-now speaking(of),
ἀλλὰ τοὺς νῦν πολιτικοὺς ἄρχοντας ἀπεικάζων
οἷς ἄρτι ἐλέγομεν ναύταις
οὐχ ἁμαρτήσῃ,
ADEIMANTOS: ( we wanted never to go that way again )
( even if ) we would walk you along the route?
( where we would rather talk about the flowers )
( or the gang of wild turkeys crossing our path )
( or the barred owl calling from the trees )
( until ) we sink into my mattress ( and close my eyes )
( measuring my sighs by the cicadas )
( memories being our superpower )
( he out )
SOKRATES: and(indeed)the useless(unprofitable-
unserviceable ones)(so-spoken)by(from-under)these,
καὶ τοὺς ὑπὸ τούτων ἀχρήστους λεγομένους
ADEIMANTOS: ( so letswalk in ) to my old school ( at least,
one of them ) ( and there are many different schools )
( looking at random bulletins ) ( we calm my nerves )
( in a basement hallway ) ( until seminar gets out
and then the young come flooding in ) ( and then
somebody recognizes me ) ( its nighttime now )
( and cold ) ( and everyone is nicely dressed )
( or its the snowflakes on their eyelashes )
( and now we want a cigarette ) ( its toxic )
( cozy ) ( colonial brick-red ) ( and dangerous )
( but somehow we survived ) ( and yes, its true,
we didnt want to leave ) ( and yes, its true,
we needed to ) ( but later there will be a dance )
( it was indeed a party school ) ( o un-wasted
youth ) ( but there were many different schools )
( so that our pirate coat has many pockets
and bears the motif of democracy )
( ugly ) ( versatile ) ( pastiche ) and hope
its a portal ( indeed as Cheehaw Station
little man ),
SOKRATES: and( indeed )( ones being- )spoken( of
as )shop-talkers after heavenly-lofty( star-signs,
climate, weather-gossip )things
( to-for-by )( the )as-truly( unconcealedly )steersmen,
καὶ μετεωρολέσχας τοῖς ὡς ἀληθῶς κυβερνήταις.
HERA: who have( and hold the )broad sky( heavens ),
οἳ οὐρανὸν εὐρὺν ἔχουσι.
SAILORS: ( at the )most-straight( -upright-angles ),
ὀρθότατα,
SOKRATES: ( he would )
show every corner with a story attached
( to his capacity )
you know where we want to be
( as things come up ) ( naturally ),
SAILORS: (he)was saying,
ἔφη.
SOKRATES: ( you would have ) sweet-bitter ( memories )
and we would write our own ( shared )
( braided ) good ( memories around them ),
HERA: now(you), consider(ponder-bethink-purpose-plan-
contrive-observe-beware)(you were considering),
lest(to-for-by)you, we(would)back-again(hereafter)craft
(devise-contrive-wile-counsel-plan)(we would)(we will)
(squeeze-out the juice)(curdle the milk)(you,
squeezed and curdled)some-
thing evil(ugly-bad),
φράζεο νῦν μή τοί τι κακὸν μητίσομ᾽ ὀπίσσω.
ADEIMANTOS: ( and his are the voices questioning him )
( he doesnt ask to be or not to be ) comfy ( he he ),
( he asks ) ( what is this-he? ) ( who does his best for you )
( in whom you trust ) ( that we might get it right )
on the faded streets ( about specific names,
and dates, and details ) ( or we might get it wrong )
( but we will write things other men dont like )
( we write whom they would make impossible ),
SOKRATES: and therefore from these and( indeed )in these,
( its )not easy( for )the best pursuit to( have a )good
( well-seeming )reputation,
by( from-under )those pursuing( its dyad )opposites;
ἔκ τε τοίνυν τούτων καὶ ἐν τούτοις
οὐ ῥᾴδιον εὐδοκιμεῖν τὸ βέλτιστον ἐπιτήδευμα
ὑπὸ τῶν τἀναντία ἐπιτηδευόντων:
ADEIMANTOS: ( but there isnt much worth rescuing )
of this dying ( profession ), ( the gag that stole
the logos-word by which we do ) ( she says
they treat her like their garbage can ) ( until
he takes her back for you ) ( slowly at first )
( until he cleans her up, empties her out )
( and keeps her warm until shes young and blew
and beautiful again ) cuddly ( enacting she )
( who holds our end ) ( or what, Sokrates? ),
SOKRATES: but by( far )many( the )greatest
and( indeed )most-forceful( violent-strong )slander
( false-accusation-charges )come-to-be
( against )philosophy( wisdom-love ),
(489δ) πολὺ δὲ μεγίστη καὶ ἰσχυροτάτη διαβολὴ
γίγνεται φιλοσοφίᾳ
ADEIMANTOS: ( in the ashes of that ) darling town,
SOKRATES: through those claiming to pursue such things —
διὰ τοὺς τὰ τοιαῦτα φάσκοντας ἐπιτηδεύειν
ADEIMANTOS: as statecraft.
( but what they do, o Sokrates
he beauty-calls ) as endless war.
//
from hymn to Apollo
Republic VI
bling
my dessert comes salted
her spoonlicked sins of virgins
her cruelty is caramel
my man comes from the desert
he tethers me with whispers
the musk of his camel
who am i
//
and the sending
fitting (you)
let go and loosened (upon you)
(i) am (it) is (they) are i say
has brought
(a message)
(wandered)
unconcealed
// 153β
καὶ ἐπιεικῶς
ἦν δ᾽ ἐγώ
ἀληθῆ ἀπήγγελται
a visit with the donkey of Rabi'a al-'Adawiya
if the world would like to hear how Rabi’a
gained courage or her strange immunity
to fear, for friendship, i would explain. yet,
a friend is not a purveyor of shallots; nor
pinned apples, by the donkey’s tale. her debt
of tears she brought with her most carefully.
this baggage carries me, her dogged ass;
my nag for recollection married with
my nap of opportunity. fresh dates
don’t pluck a prophet from the fetching tree.
a footfelt softness is velvet delivery
under her bending limb, and broken news
is armor. what teeming droplets, but by winter?
what is the desert, if not her country of birth?
what is her coin, if not the cake she gives
right back, the moment she has tasted worth.
//
Phaedrus: (as Lysias, cont.)
and not as many as
will enjoy the gain (apo-lauein)
of your season (hora)
but those who will give after (meta-didonai)
of their own goods (ton spheteron agathon)
to one born older (presbuteroi genomenoi)
// 234α
οὐδὲ ὅσοι τῆς σῆς ὥρας ἀπολαύσονται
ἀλλ᾽ οἵτινες πρεσβυτέρῳ γενομένῳ τῶν σφετέρων ἀγαθῶν μεταδώσουσιν
//
in this, changed “dense” to “rich”.
have also reworked the (tricky)
first few lines of the Lysias speech.
desert habit
i leave
i keep leaving you
until i am your habit of leaving
and when you give me ways
like the unwilling
that i am
i breathe
for i am not
leaving scattered by the wind
so you keep me walking away
i will find your face
my love
//
Phaedrus: (as Lysias, cont.)
and in other familiars (oikeios)
they come to be (gignomai)
experienced (empeiros)
// 232ε
καὶ τῶν ἄλλων οἰκείων ἔμπειροι ἐγένοντο
stranger like desire
you will come
into the desert
to know me
you will touch me like a stranger
as many strokes
as many surfaces
as many names
as many hungry palms
as your servant can carry
so empty this
your lick across the burning sand
electricity of my thirst
//
Phaedrus: (as Lysias, cont.)
you will come (hekein)
into difference (diaphora)
with them
// 232δ
ἥξεις αὐτοῖς εἰς διαφοράν
//
red (palm) sugar
you will come
into the dessert
to taste them
you will eat fried plantains
ripened until soft and sweet
crunchy with red sugar
too hot for wasted time
i almost burn my tongue
flesh tender and yellow
greasy fingers with coconut
oil and sticky lips
but did you really
//
iced kepo
iced kepo is freshly-squeezed
orange juice with just-cracked
coconut water over ice
on a hot
day before the rain
comes
maybe the traffics religion is
theres something superficial
about s-e-x
//
(kepo also means gossip)
//
🌔
//
new years 2026
i witness your erosion through the glass
my history disappearing by the hour
and snow consumes to whiteout; i am cold
turned witless by distance and disbelief
and there are no more familiar houses, faces
are spreading, thinning, greying, pale, the young
mere vanishing into the adult flood, like
we didn’t want any of it
the cruiseliner is sinking into sand
nobody made the call, nevertheless
it’s all you ever say; whoever has a camel
hard fast to roll the tents and carry it
how do you chase your longing through the dunes
and did her caravan leave any trace
or do you doubt if she was ever there
or do you see her in the doe, the goat, the raven
do you become her in the cursive carved
by thirst, the desert bridegroom winding through
until you haunt the edges of their encampment
inhuman as the hajj, kin to al-Shanfara
locals popping-off begin at dusk
explosions quickening unevenly
as child-sized rockets into midnight, when at once
fireworks engulf the island, terrifying animals
i turn a light on for the chickens
Black Ajax has fallen out of his black tree
he gibbers darkly as he hobbles toward me
the light, a blacker perch; gibbering, i walk him through it
//
selamat tahun baru🥂
//
our chickens are
most junglefowl
we don’t fight them
as, with cocks, is done
but they are fighters
//
winter under wax & wick bottled
winter under wax
on church circle, dark december in the upstairs bar
a brass banister slides under my pink merino glove
words quiet, two or four of us at a mahogany table, hunter
green and a glass globe of spiced amber medicinal
or new years post-midnight, lit sobranie at the window
my flat over the cobalt classy resto where i worked
high-waisted and fetching wine for devil’s cash from tourists
my slanted bedroom walls still blue for my boss’s baby
alone finishing a bottle of champagne with poetry
down gazing over main street empty, marketed, icy
and lantern halo; uphill from the glossy wavering city dock
of Annapolis sleeping under the falling snow
in great hall, a baby grand conceived her toasty fingerprints
you found me there, immersive conjecture duo lingual
brought me back to your apartment, requested we tango
through leggy glasses of burgundy whether i broke a heart
doorways into sympathy revolving thresholds of regret
fellowships unbraided by such shallow recklessness
the turning years a blur between slow burns of clarity
or tether to a substance so precious it couldn’t endure
and was sanctuary sweet, i ask at the temple of winter
retasting an icicle of rarity until it self-sealed under wax
and aged like honey; when all around it had decayed
knotwork to dust, the bitterness of ashes and Egyptian sun
//
wick bottled
wax profane
waning lunar
wick bottled
yes
and i, old lady, lug down
but 61 ivories from the loteng
dear i’m sorry for these years
pyramidical procrastination
now
are they enough
for journey to Jeddah
//
semi-nude for a photo album
their birthday was the other night
the girls were going out; the grift
delayed by getting ready; gift
of tangled, sappy rattan; caused a fright
pan, she burned some flowers on you
meta-burban, real dream for two
polaroid tacky, pantries full
of shady tatters, curtain bulls
sister, it was no dress for winter
but they were grown enough to drink
something fancy from the blender
fermented guava, lava lake
lavender flannel, camisole
white linen sheets, hung in the sun
nigel and sandi, mel and sue
genre-bender, Java won
high horse, he has a song for you
but i’ll save it for another tone
her sweaty practice, overdue
vinyasa, tapas, organ brew
dizzy lizzy ate some rice
eat, pray, love, the antichrist
jihadi, mum’s worst nightmare
Gandhi, papa’s burnt-off limb
inter-dimensional makeout queen
Osaka airport, caused a scene
village gossip, words above
she’s never catching up on love
not quite posh, but pulp turned through
realism, my lands, god knew
so sliced the flippin' longitude
bless her heart and come on in
agrimony henbane dish
too-schooled harpy hysterical
raised pie of huckleberry fish
turned river-liver radical
there’s mantra in the air tonight
what kue set in sangga stone
rise with the moon, the howling dog
the crone, her voice memorial
white-footed goat is coming home
to graze by fiery sunset view
the desert camel, bringing bones
with mother Durga, chest tattoo
a secret pocket of soil and spice
elaborate belty-thing, rhizomes in knots
not big enough for where you think
whether it is cake
//
(wants cake)
//
texas talkin blues, like this
vernacular from full moon 5/11
genius loci, pura dalem
blog 2-yr anniverse & job well done
//
as if i were a whitefoot
nameless, the gentle landscape chose
pointlost, ungiven, brutishly
endbringer to deadset hunger,
rudeness riverrun to mercy.
grim gravelshatterer, sparking flint
to be action or scenery—
object of disbelief, the ground
to goat a hesitating hoof—
or clamp too-trustingshank, object
of appetite. salivaspills
from ruthless gum of animal,
rankcivil tooth of shackledmilk;
but snarlingword, infant of dust
absent a motherverse, is howl
heartletting keen of lucid sacrifice.
come drink from me, Al-Shanfarā—
she desertlimns greydreaded; trim
your distance, wolves. the veil of thirst
is inhuman as ocean, burns
your hornsgolden by bending sun.
//
(reply to Shanfara’s Lamiyyat al-Arab, trans. by Michael A. Sells in Desert Tracings.)